The Jesus Fish Chronicles

The Jesus Fish Chronicles: Chronicle Six, Soccer mom

Wow! It’s been awhile since I last blogged about JFC…..heh…..that kind of looks like KFC. OK, sorry off topic. JFC, right! It has been awhile….hmmmm…..last September if my little blogger dashboard is correct. Living in the country side shields me from a great deal of the crazies. Never the less, I do have to drive in to the city for work, which leads me to…….

The Jesus Fish Chronicles: Chronicle Six, Soccer mom

April 22nd
6:30 pm (ish)
Blue Mini-Van

On the poor lane of 183 north, before 620. I am heading North on the poor lane to head home to dinner. This, apparently, pissed the crap out of Jesus Fish. A blond haired, what appears to be a small to medium framed woman. Lets say early to mid 30’s and happens to be driving a blue mini-van.

Her expression about being behind me is one of anxiety and the look of trying to give birth to a water buffalo right there in traffic. I apparently was in the wrong! I was in front of her you see and that prevented her from moving through me and into the spot in front of me. Thus further adding to her frustration and complicating her labor pains. IF she could have furrowed her brow any more than she was, it may have also served as a well placed napkin holder.

The true icing on the cake of our Jesus Fish, Blue mini-van driving, my bumper riding, soccer mom is that she was smoking… the van… up….with her kids in the car……with a cross hanging down from the rear view mirror. Shalom! Every life is precious right?

Our oblivious Jesus Fish also managed to flippantly almost run another person off the road in her mindless pursuit of self serving behavior. The expression on her face….she couldn’t give a hoot. Horns honking, fingers flying, high-beams flashing, our vaporous and vacant vixen, true victor of vehicular vanity because SHE owns the road and you are just a nuisance to her.

She, my gentle readers, is a Jesus Fish.

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